Raising Him Alone - Providing Resources and Support For Single Mothers Raising Boys

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Case Study: Lisa a single mother of three living outside of Charlotte, North Carolina was stalked for three years by an ex boyfriend. Like many women, Lisa did not realize the seriousness of being stalked. Lisa's moved several times and changed jobs at least four times. Lisa's stalker was eventually arrested after months of repeated threats at her job and at her home. Lisa contacted the police and was able to save her own life and the life of her children. Lisa is alive due to her willingness to "take charge of her own life."

"Somewhere in America, a woman is raped every 2 minutes" Of the almost 3.5 million violent crimes committed against family members, 49% of these were crimes against spouses. 84% of spouse abuse victims were females, and 86% of victims of dating partner abuse at were female. Males were 83% of spouse murderers and 75% of dating partner murderers. 50% of offenders in state prison for spousal abuse had killed their victims. Wives were more likely than husbands to be killed by their spouses: wives were about half of all spouses in the population in 2002, but 81% of all persons killed by their spouse. Women are more likely to be victims of sexual violence than men: 78% of the victims of rape and sexual assault are women and 22% are men. Most perpetrators of sexual violence are men. Among acts of sexual violence committed against women since the age of 18, 100% of rapes, 92% of physical assaults, and 97% of stalking acts were perpetrated by men. Sexual violence against men is also mainly male violence: 70% of rapes, 86% of physical assaults, and 65% of stalking acts were perpetrated by men In 8 out of 10 rape cases, the victim knows the perpetrator. Of people who report sexual violence, 64% of women and 16% of men were raped, physically assaulted, or stalked by an intimate partner. This includes a current or former spouse, cohabitating partner, boyfriend/girlfriend, or date. You should not blame yourself for being battered or mistreated (Love should not hurt) You are not the cause of your partner's abusive behavior You deserve to be treated with respect Everyone deserves to be happy and safe Your children should not have to live in fear Never be afraid to contact the police if you are being threatened or stalked Identify safe places in your house. Know where to go if your abuser attacks or begins and argument with you that you believe may escalate towards violence. If possible, head for a room with a phone and an outside door or window. Come up with a code word. Establish a word, phrase, or signal you can use to let your children, friends, neighbors, or co-workers know that you're in danger and the police should be called. Children who grow up in homes and experience violence often struggle with: Higher levels of aggression Anger Hostility Oppositional Behavior Disobedience Fear Anxiety Withdrawal and Depression Challenges in school Inability to focus Poor peer, sibling, and social relationships Issues with self esteem and self worth Ending Domestic abuse begins and ends with becoming more informed and educating families about resources to support healing. Contact you local Police Department. Dial 911. This call may save your life! After the Trauma: www.afterthetrauma.org Help Guide for Child Abuse: http://helpguide.org/mental/child_abuse_physical_emotional_sexual_neglect.htm National Coalition Against Domestic Violence: www.ncadv.org/ National Domestic Violence Hotline: www.ndvh.org National Resources for Sexual Abuse: www.darkness2light.org/GetHelp/national.asp Promoting the Truth: www.promotetruth.org